Monday, March 10, 2014

3.9.14/This is hard

Hey Everyone.  Yesterday I woke up feeling pretty good, all things considered.  We had a few visitors,  I went on a wheel chair ride outside (my new version of fun) and took a tour of the NICU.  
It really put it into prospective when I saw the NICU- it did not help me feel better but just a lot sadder.  Realizing that this baby is going to be whisked away at delivery without getting to hold him is going to be rough.  At his age we also just aren't sure what to expect.  It sounds like babies born at 30/31 weeks are on the bubble for lung development.  Some come out crying and some will need help ASAP.

At around 4pm yesterday I noticed some contractions coming on.   My mom was getting into town around 6 and between 5 and the time she arrived my contractions were getting much more strong.   Back went the IV and they put me on Magnesium (which is used in case this was real labor and the baby is coming- to protect brain bleeds in preemies).  The doses are so high that they won't let you get out of bed the entire time you are on Magnesium because it makes you feel like cronk.  Since I couldn't get up, they put a catheter in.  So between having labor contractions, a catheter and magnesium it made for a very long hard night.  Everyone thought the baby was coming (including my self and the docs).  At some point in the middle of the night, I started to feel slightly better.  All of the sudden my body was able to relax and I just knew that I wasn't going to give birth.    So here I am, recovering from the hellish night I had- thankful I still have an inside baby (rather than an outside baby).  I don't know if I can have another night like last again and make it.  I wanted to die.

At this point my doctors say that I will probably give birth sooner than later since my body seems to be "trying".  Tomorrow I turn 31 weeks.  My goal is not even to make it to 32 + anymore but just 1 more day. 

Thanks for checking in everyone. 


  1. I don't know what to say, other than try to stay strong for that little baby! He needs a strong momma and you are doing a great job. You're going to get through this. Praying for you every chance I get. Hang in there Emily.

  2. You are so strong! Baby G is the same way. Been thinking about you 3 and praying a lot! PS - love the outside vs. inside baby comment :)

    Emily Matlock

  3. We are praying for you, your husband and your precious baby! So glad your mom is in town. Patty Timm (Nicole Ryder’s mom)

  4. Emily, so glad Janon is there. What a horrific experience. I have a gut feeling everything is going to be alright...just not the easiest way there is. You are a strong faithful beautiful person and wife, and the Lord will help you be the same strengths in a mother to him. Thanks so much for your blog! It means alot, Prayers everywhere xoxoox

  5. Emily, I keep rereading your posts. Honey, I'm praying from the bottom of my heart. love love Beth C

  6. Praying continually!!! Someday this little guy is going to read about everything that you went through to get him here (even before all of this) and he'll understand how blessed he is to have a mom as strong and as faithful as you! Hang in there, momma! Love you guys!

  7. Pray all is well with you and the baby today! Patty Timm